I Wasn’t Supposed to Love You

When you walked

by me today

As if I was a stranger.

As if I wasn’t someone

you know

I felt thoughtlessly

tossed aside

Don’t fall in love with a straight girl

My lesbian friends always warned me

But meeting you

wasn’t something I planned

Wanting to be more than friends

wasn’t something I wanted

As our friendship deepened,

I noticed the only thing

that got me through my hard

days at work

was knowing

you would be at home

when I got back

No matter

how tired,

discouraged,

frustrated I was,

it would all melt away

when I heard your voice

when I saw your smile

I tried to put these feelings

out of my mind

because you said you

were straight

But when you told me you had

had sex with women,

a door of hope opened a bit

And when you said you

Consider yourself Bi-curious

And would be open to having a relationship

With a woman, I couldn’t help but smile

You are the woman I fantasize about

You have the skin that I hunger to touch

It’s in your arms that I want to be

When you said you

would be leaving within a month,

I felt shaken,

What would I do

without your support,

without your touch?

I know you said you don’t know

what my type is

I remember the

Compliments you’ve showered

on me –

what a nice ass I have,

what beautiful feet I have,

that I look like I’m in my early 2Os.

I’m scared to take the risk,

And find out if you like me

That way too.

My heart melts when

I hear and see

the kindness you

willingly extend to others

Giving even when it hurts you

When you asked if your breasts

would look good in a T-shirt without a bra

When you asked if you have a nice ass,

I don’t know,

Where you wondering what I thought

Woman to woman,

or lover of women to lover of women?

© By Nicole

December 13, 2011